I was strangled by a llama today.

I was almost strangled (to death) by a llama. I never thought I’d type that. And I’m sure you never thought you’d read that. This picture to the right is evidence of the rope burn from around my neck. A llama wanted me dead. I felt the tight pull of a rope around my neck, and as I screamed, Donnie stood their watching. It must be quite a site to see someone being boa constricted by a camelid.

Forgetfully, I placed a lead rope around my neck when I went to get some grain. We were trying to remove the halters from two of the llamas – they had grown into their faces. And so, while coaxing Cybil with some food, I sleekly latched the hook of the lead rope to her halter. She didn’t like that. And started running. I, however, was on one side of the fence, she on the other. Within seconds, I was up against the fence, a rope pulled tight around my neck. Donnie stood there. (As I pointed out earlier.) Quick thinking saw me, like a ninja, find the loose end of the rope and unfurl it from my neck. Sweet freedom! And all the time, I kept my grip firm. The halter was eventually removed.

This happened in the afternoon. This morning, I chopped off the top of my left thumb. I mean, it’s still there, kind of. Under copious bandages. Maybe I’ll inspect the damage, and avoid fainting, in a week or so.

What a day. What a day! We also attended the “Fully Committed – A Gay Wedding Affair” gay wedding fair and made some wonderful contacts. Delicious cakes, beautiful flowers, and the fancy Athletic Club. And then some antique shopping and martinis. All in all, a jam-packed Sunday. Oh, and we have a full house of guests. And I’ve made brownies from scratch. Tasting TBD.

One can only handle so much in a day. An attempted strangling by an animal, chopping part of a finger off, and three blue lemon-tinins have reminded me that my cup does, indeed, runneth over. So some wine and get me to bed. Tomorrow presents a whole new set of adventures to be experienced. Do my ducks have any daggers? The lamb a machete?

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